In today’s blog post, I want to chat about the power of choice. We have the right to say yes or no to situations or people.
As a recovering people pleaser, I learned this the hard way. I am learning how empowering and freeing it is to exercise effective decision making. For most of my life, my default answer was yes to a lot of things, even when it cost me my peace. I enjoy serving and helping others, probably because it is my main love language, but serving others came to a standstill because I had nothing left to give. I took some time to analyse why I got to that place then I received revelation on the importance of saying no when necessary. This process taught me that there is a time for everything in life. Whatever we do must be done in healthy ways and according to the capacity we have as individuals.
Our bodies, brains and minds are good communicators. When something is wrong, your body or feelings usually react or respond to your decisions. When someone asks for your help with something that you should not necessarily be involved in, you may feel weird and uncomfortable after agreeing to assist. That feeling could be an indicator that whatever they require is not for you. You may feel extremely exhausted by certain surroundings, every time you are exposed to these you find your energy gets drained in ways you cannot explain. Often, our bodies and minds give us small signals and can aid in effective decision making. The issue is we are not accustomed to listening to the good internal voice or the way our bodies communicate with us, we, therefore miss any warnings or guidance that could have helped us.
For us to become mentally and emotionally healthy people, it is important to know when to agree to activities and know when to say no to some tasks- regardless of who may be asking us. We have a responsibility to keep our mental and emotional states healthy. This cannot be achieved if we do not know our limits and capacity. Self-awareness plays a huge role in this. It helps to have a targeted approach to your activities that way you know what matters or what should be released in that season of your life.
I used to get so exhausted quite often and would wonder why. I realized that I exhausted myself with many unnecessary activities that were not worth it. I have learned to know where my focus and energies should be at a given time. This helps me in saying no as often as I should. Not everything is as important or urgent as it appears to be, other things can take the back seat until the right time and season. You are given the power to choose effectively so that you can focus on nurturing your gifts and stewarding what God has entrusted you with.
I encourage you today to advocate for your mental health by choosing wisely, you are the only person that can do it. When your cup is filled with goodness, you can easily impart this to the people you interact with. When you are drained, your view of life becomes compromised, and you can easily influence others from that standpoint. So, heal. Say no, when you should. Say yes when healthy God-ordained opportunities come your way. Do not wait for your environment to be peaceful, but rather choose to bring the peace of God in it. This mindset shift will eliminate unnecessary exhaustion, abuse and bitterness. May God give you the grace to know who and what needs you right now. May He expand your wisdom to know what to let go of and how to do it.
“We are allowed to do anything”, so they say. That is true, but not everything is good. “We are allowed to do anything”- but not everything is helpful. – 1 Corinthians 10:23.